hey, i don't think i ever wrote about this.
but, i got jumped by a homeless man a few months ago at santa monica.

first i was walking towards santa monica public library.
this tall, 6'1, 250 pounds white homeless man with shaggy hair and beard, really dirty.
came up to me and asked me for a dime to open a wine bottle.
i checked my pockets...
i said, i only have a quarter.
he says, "i'll take that too."
lol
so i gave it to him.
then, he shouts out to me, "YOU KNOW IT"
so i responded, "I KNOW IT"
and i walked off towards the library.
i thought nothing of this.

then, after i borrowed my book, i walked down to santa monica beach.
i was on the road right next to the beach, enjoying my walk.

then, all of a sudden, someone tackles me from the side.
i got pushed to the side.
then, he comes up and puts me in a headlock.

i think should i retaliate? but if i do, i go to jail too.
there's people all around just watching us.

then, i realized it's the same guy that i gave the quarter to.
he says, "give me money!!"
and i say, "i already gave you a quarter, get off me."
he says, "no you didn't"
i say, "yes, i did give you a quarter already, GET THE FUCK OFF ME!!!!"
i shouted it the loudest i can.
then he responds, "oh, you don't like me???"
i'm thinking, wtf.
i respond, "you know i love you man, just get off me."
then he got off me.
he put out his hand to shake my hand.
i didn't want to touch his dirty hands.
so i put out my fist and gave him a fist bump instead.
LOL

i wonder if he was joking around and wanted to be friendly with me.
or, was he trying to attack me.
i really don't know.
i know if i retaliated, it would have only made the situation worse.

some of these homeless people are really crazy.
they don't know the line.
they will cross it.
when i see a homeless person nowadays, i make sure i maneuver myself
10 feet away by the time i get to them
they can't ask me for change.

what i learned from this...
the king of the streets is the homeless people.
it's their home if you think about it.

especially if they look drunk.
i recommend you keep your distance.
even if you believe in the good in people.

edit: 9/05/08

the homeless guy looked like this, but dirtier and less famous.

that black girl i gave a ride home..
she really has good conversation skills.
every line that comes out of her mind is a set up for a joke.
everything is geared towards having a good time.
unfortunately, my brain couldn't keep up...
and, the conversation got dominated by my usual normal topics.
man, if i had 25% of her joking skills, i would be a pimp.
she isn't very attractive, but she is really fun.
also, i can sorta tell she is a good person deep down.
she wants to become a correctional officer.
a CORRECTIONAL OFFICER.
why would a person chose that occupation?
i realized that she wants to help troubled people.
help them to fix their lives.
there must be a deep reason why she wants to do that for a living.

i actually tricked this mexican dude at work and admitted that i lied as a joke.
i actually made a joke!
haha
i don't think they laughed much.
but, that's not what's important.
the important part was that i tried something new.
so, it's progress.
this guy always tricks me and says shit to make fun of me.
so i got him back.
i think i get it now.
you go into the joke fully knowing you are lying.
but, you have to reveal in the end that it was a lie to make it a joke.
i guess, it's one form of messing around.

1. i gotta keep push'n push'n.

2. the ability to NOT say something is as important as actually saying something.

3. if you can control what NOT to say, you can...
a. keep secrets.
b. keep yourself from saying hurtful things that might hurt a relationship.
c. withold information that might hurt myself or others.
d. instill trust in others, showing that you have self-discipline.

4. still, any mistakes, flaw, is NO big deal, in the end.

5. i felt the power of prayer today. i know someone or myself prayed really hard, and created very positive energy for me.

6. when you think you can't do it, that's exactly when you have to PUSH and breakthrough to the next level.

7. real growth happens in the area where you cannot even conceive to be reality. you outgrow your current self when you reach a point where in the past you could have never imagined such an outcome or result.

8. and, real growth happens, by consistently pushing forward, towards a general direction of progress. you really don't know how it will end up, but the results will be larger than what you believed would happen.

i've been working at omgarget for 4 months now.
i just got the employee of the month award.
it's out of like 100 employees too. lol

this is teaching me something new about myself.
i really low ball my abilities.

here, i was thinking i was this socially inept, outcast type person.
who can't do anything right.
i thought all these managers hated me for having such a bad personality.

but, they unanimously voted me the best employee of the month.
they tell me that usually there is difference in opinons, but it was the first time
a name was called unanimously.
wtf.
maybe, my affirmation, "friendly" is working really well.

i do try my best to help customers the best i can.
i feel this sense of anger when i can't find a product for a customer.
that's how much i want them to find what they are looking for.
maybe it's that spirit that they see.
i'm not sure.

anyways, i got the employee of the month.
this is my first job out of college too.
it kinda boosts my confidence in my people skills.

this shows me that i will be able to work at a regular job if i wanted to.

it's month 4, 8 more months of omgarget training.

the manager who gave me the award seems like she really supportful of me.
i really like her.
yea, she is the hottest girl in the store, but i like her because she is so supportive of what i'm doing at the store.
makes me want to work harder.

i told her today about getting scammed, and all that too.
turns out she went to uci and usc and got recruited straight into omgarget for an executive position.
she really rocks. she's only 22-3 and doing things that most adults would have a hard time doing.
overseeing a store that has over 40k customer traffic, 100k+ daily revenue, and over 30 employees working simultaneously.
she is amazing.

2nd coming
the new beginning
the truth is speaking
you should listen

so glorious
victorious
we take what we want
we born warriors.

if you fall, get up and try again.
if you drop, get up and try again.

blood sweat and tears,
we dripped all 3 just to get here.

we tired of being runners up.
we coming up.YUP.
We ready for whatever you put in front of us.

hard work pays off, we get what we put in...
why stop now?
i gotta keep push'n push'n.

we in the fight till the finish.
so why not fight till you finish.

I’m my own author, here’s my story.

My life’s been full of pain,

Now where’s my glory?

so glorious
victorious
we take what we want
we born warriors.

i don't care anymore.
i'm tired of being friendly.
i'll just be me.
it should be enough.
i'll just do "friendly" when i can tell, i'm being a little too asshole.

i hadn't been really lifting. lol
all i was doing was getting small amounts of cardio & moving my muscles.
unless you are challenging your muscle's limit, you don't really grow.
in the last 2 weeks, i've seen really big changes in how my body looks.
it was really lean before.
but now, i can see more definition.
it's starting to look like those magazine dudes.
i think if i keep up at this rate.
it'll be pretty high level.
but, i really don't want to look like those muscle fitness guys.
i just want to look like men's health.

Turtles as a Symbol

From history to present day there are
many belief symbols. Some are of good omens and some
are of bad omens. We even see some of these symbols
in our dreams. Have you ever wondered what the turtle
symbol represents in different cultures and meanings?
In this article I summarize some of those symbol beliefs.

Dreams... What do they mean? The
turtle seen in a dream indicates an unusual improvement.
This would be a positive omen. Turtles in a negative
aspect means fear of facing responsibility or reality.
However, a turtle can represent long life because turtles
live a long time. They also have quiet strength.

Spirituality:

In the far east, the turtles shell was
a symbol of heaven and the square underside was a symbol
of Earth. This meant that the turtle was an animal whose
magic united heaven and Earth.

In the west, early Christians viewed turtles
as a symbol of evil forces during war.

In the Hindu myth the tortoise Chukwa
supports the world. The turtle also represents the creator
and holder of the Earth and everything it contains.
In the Balinese scripture -- Any person who consumes
and supports the killing of turtles is not a good Hindu,
and is doing a dishonor to himself, thus disconnecting
himself from proper Balinese religious practices.

Cultures:

Japanese - The turtle is a symbol
of good fortune and longevity. The turtle is an positive
omen bringing 10,000 years of happiness. The Cosmic
Mountain and the abode of the Jennin are supported by
a tortoise.

Chinese - The turtle carries the
world on its back. This is a symbol of fertility, vitality,
and great patience. The Chinese believed these animals
foretold future events. They are the third animal of
four that represents water and was thought to be a model
of the world. Its upper shell curved like the heavens
and its lower shell was flat (the way the Chinese at
the time believed the Earth was). They read the future
in the pattern on the tortoise shell.

The tortoise also supports the world.
Its four feet being the four corners of the Earth. It
is the Black Warrior, depicting strength and endurance.
It was credited with a great life span and was therefore
a symbol of longevity. As a warrior the tortoise joined
the dragon on the banners of the imperial army. Both
representing indestructibility as neither can destroy
each other. The tortoise can not be crushed nor the
dragon reached.

Polynesian - The turtle symbolized
fertility and long life.

African - The turtle originated
ju ju and appears in fertility rites. It represents
the feminine to the serpent's masculine power.

Greco - As the feminine power of
the waters, the turtle was an emblem of Aphrodite/Venus
in Greco-Roman myth.