also, i am starting to realize that a lot of my viewpoints are shallow.
i base a lot of my opinions on very little information.
before i come to a conclusion about something, i should really gather lots of data and from many different angles.
and, the only way to do this is to experience that which i want to know about.
also the information itself i'm basing my opinons on are suspect.
i need to learn to differentiate truth from boshit.

this time she was chinese.
she was wearing a very classy yet flamboyant outfit of white and black.
she was very tall, very sexy.
she summoned me like no other guest.
she put out her hand at me, palms facing me.
i could tell she could see my aura energy.
she grabbed my energy with the tips of her fingers.
and grabbed and made a fist to pull me in.
fucking, OG shit man.
you don't meet a woman like that everyday.
she seemed hella rich too.
she was looking for a CD called, "evening in barcelona."
i helped her find it.
but, while we were walking towards it.
she started telling me about submitting to the authority.
then raising my confidence, then, naturally my body will heal itself.
my response to her was, "you are a fantastic woman."
it's crazy stuff, i know, but i like this type of encounter with people.
it's more exciting than, the usual normal stuff.
she really fascinated me.
she was very artistic & the way she talked was 1 / 1000.

anyways, the artistic, wizard-style women are in my vicinity lately.
that cawwwwww, black woman has started a trend.
i hope i meet a couple more wizards to broaden my horizon, even further.

og-mutha-fuck'n-shit.

today i realized that i don't really have to be like anyone to feel good about myself.
i don't have to adjust my emotions to others constantly.
i can just be me & it's good enough.
sure, some days some people will feel really high energy and i won't. and, vice versa.
that doesn't mean things are necessarily bad, just we were different on that particular day.
and, it really isn't a big deal.

i also learned a new way of dealing with negative thoughts.
i just observe that which is bothering me and think, "so what?"
really, what's so bad about it that it should make me feel bad? nothing.
most things are so trivial, it shouldn't even take a second away from my happiness.
thanks bb, i got this one from you.

also, letting people have the win.
some people like to be boss, in my case, they really are the boss.
i just let them be the boss.
it shouldn't take anything away from me.
it's just a position they have at work.
i should let them be/do their position.
and, i should just do a good job at getting things done.

i stopped taking ginseng.
my mind felt slower, but i think it's better for me that i don't take it.
when i'm on it, i really feel too hyper and i'm moving around like an ant.
busy, busy, busy.
too busy.
then, when the ginseng rocks out, then i feel drained.
i think the ginseng also raises my estrogen, because today without it, i felt extra attracted to women.

also, today, all day long, highly attractive women in all age ranges were everywhere. maybe it's because it's sunday. i don't know.

omg this job is so perfect for me.
i really feel it's the right gradient for me at this time in my life.
meeting so many people.
interacting with so many different types of guests.
really, it's opening my mind up and allowing me to mingle with people i would have never.
also, interacting with the opposite sex too.
i think it's all practice.
you learn to say the right things at the right time by just continuosly picking up ways of
coversing from everywhere.
the reason why i got so tongue tied before and sometimes didn't have response to people is because i just didn't have enough experience talking with all sorts of people.
i used to have a wall between me and anyone else who is not japanese.
but now, that doesn't even matter.
i can get along with blacks, hispanics, asians, whites, whoever.
if i keep doing omgarget for another 8 months, i know i'll be so much better.
progress is good.
yesterday, i drove this indian dude named collin to his house.
today i drove a black girl to her house.
there's alot of people who don't drive and just take the bus & train to work.
it suxors bigtime for them.
tomorrow, i'm gonna go work out w a guy named loyd @ 10am at ballys.
so much new interaction. it's non-stop.
omgarget gets new employees on a continous basis.
most of them are in their early 20s tho.
but it's cool, i get along with younger people pretty well.
keeps me young too.

the other day, this guy named carlos & i were talking. he thought i was younger than him. he is 19 years old. lololol

this might be a world's first orginal ass exercise.
an OG ass excercise created by ME.

this really works. i did 1 year of glute machine & tried all kinds
of stuff on youtube. nothing worked. my whole body is 6% body fat but
for some reason my inner thighs & butt would not get worked. so i
created my own technique.

my technique is superior and you can feel & see the results in a week.
this is a no joke situation we are talking about here!

only try this if you are already advanced at exercise. i don't want anyone getting hurt.

here it is:

1. lie down on the floor, facing down.

2. chin on the ground, tummy touching the ground, legs straight facing
down, only the tops of each toe touching the ground, arms straight,
hands palms faced up towards ceiling, next to hips.

3. now, spread your legs as comfortably far as possible.

4.  now, lift the sole of your right foot towards the ceiling as high as
comfortably possible, while keeping your leg straight. dont' bend your leg. emphasize
feeling the tension in your ass. the tighter it feels the better it is
working.

5. now, lower your right foot down, but only let the top of your big toe be
touching the floor. this leave your ass in a position where it is still
a little tense.

6. now, lift the sole of your left foot towards the ceiling as high as comfortably
possible, while keeping your legs straight. emphasize feeling the
tension in your ass. the tighter it feels the better it is working.

7. now, lower your left foot down, but only let the top of your big toe be
touching the floor. this leave your ass in a position where it is still
a little tense.

8. that's basically it, now you can continue this process as fast as
comfortably possible. emphasizing how the tenseness in your ass
muscles.

9. do 50 lifts for each leg, that's 100 total.

that's it! you will feel your ass getting worked. and, your ass will feel and look 10 years younger in a week.

now i have to figure out the inner thighs. i'll let you know once i figure it out.

edit

ps: i thought i was the only person in the world who was doing this exercise. i was wrong. i was watching vh1 and matthew mcconaughey was doing the same thing on the sand on the beach. there were girls walking by staring at what he was doing. i can't believe he does this very embarrassing ass exercise in public.

1. LC from the hills makes 75k per episode. she's done 4 seasons already, it's prolly made her a millionaire already.

2. i am part of 2 small groups of friends from the college years. one consists of 6. the other, 8. 14 altogether. omg. i just thought about it, every single one of them make 50k+ 2-3 of them 75k+ and maybe 5 of them make 100k+/year. includes, pharmacists, lawyers, engineers, food inspectors, mechanics, etc.. fuck, i am the only one that makes 9k/year. lol i really tried to go bigtime through stocks early on, right out of college. i was excelling in the beginning, but now i'm the poorest because of scams. i wonder if i can still make a comeback. all i need is 50k and really, anything is possible. i just need to keep saving up till i can get that going again. also, prolly getting hit was good. i needed this type of experience to ground me and teach me a lesson on humility. so, if i make it back to the top next time around, it will be richer & more fulfilling because i will truly be able to appreciate it.

3. my mom told me that i should stick with my current job until i am ready for a real job. i think she's right. i really should focus on normalizing my social skills before moving forward. this job right now is the best place to learn it.

4. the making of the band 4 and the sweet 16 remix sending them off to dirt poor countries is really fun to watch.

5.“If you hear the dogs barking, keep going. If you hear them yelling
after you, keep going. If you see the lights behind you, keep going. If
you want a taste of freedom, keep going.” man, slaves had it rough. this part of hillary's speech really stuck in my mind. this line just sapped the positive energy out of me and just made me feel total pity for black people. it really made my heart feel sorrow. it made me imagine a black mother who is about to get caught, who can't keep going forward, telling her child to keep going no matter what. the democrats really know how to play with people's hearts.

6. gained 7 pounds in a week plus few days. is this too quick? higher weights, larger meals, protein supplements. works too well.

7. i'm so stupid. why did i throw away my mahjong dvds? what a waste. next time something bad happens i'm keeping all my valuable goods. no more wastefulness for the sake of spirituality.

1. spirit of sacrifice
2. noble, deeper version of "friendly"
3. trusting my own mind
4. trusting my own heart

5. a lowriding, shady looking dude in dark glasses threw up the crips gang sign at me today. i knew it man, when i shave my head to zero this kind of shit starts happening. but i really don't want to go back to 1 fade. as long as i don't do anything, it should just end at gang signs so who cares.

6. i got pulled over by the cops today. it was because my back left brake lights were out. it was the first time i was asked if was on parole. wtf. i knew it man, when i shave my head to zero this kind of shit starts happening.lol

7. my vision of "friendly" isn't just the superficial type that is displayed at the outermost layer of our personality. ofc that energetic, lighthearted, smiley energy is important too at times, but i want my version of "friendly" to be deeper. i want it to direct my thoughts, actions and emotions in a direction that truly makes me a good friend to humanity. i'm taking the word "friendly" to a new level. i want to make the word, noble. being a friend, being friendly, is one of the most basic & fundamental attributes of a heathy individual but also one of the highest achievements a person can make in thier lifetime.

8. in order to be friendly, at times it is necessary to sacrifice. doing things that we don't want to do, and doing it anyways by sacrificing effort, emotion or energy, is a vital part of making things work between people. generously sacrifice for best results.

9. i have become too adept at criticizing myself & finding flaws. i will now work on trusting my mind, heart & body. by learning to trust myself, i foresee myself expanding. i will discover new positive aspects of myself by allowing myself to trust myself. i trust my mind. i trust my heart. i trust my body.

10. i used to love watching yakuza & mahjong gangster movies. i stopped watching them, i actually threw all the videos & dvd's away when the scam fallout happened. i wanted to wash myself clean of all impurities and repent so that my karma would improve. i really miss those gangster movies.

10am chi to vet
12-1 ballys workout
2-6 oc, san clemente, dana point, mcdonalds
7-8 bb's work out 24 hr fitness
9-11:30 dinner chill

was a very productive good day.
thanks bb for dinner & advice.

i need a 30k min. job
ahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh

lol i thought this protein strategy was flopping.
turns out, it might actually work!
but, i do like the lightness of 140 pounds.
there's nothing like it.
oh well.. if i get 150 i win.
if i stay 140 i win.
can't lose situation.

i think i cracked the code for good posture.
when i kept trying to keep good posture by pushing my chest out
it really created unnecessary backlash from alpha males.
it gets tiring after a while, competing who is stronger.

i found the key.
good posture should start with the chin.
keeping the chin up.
when it starts from the chin, everything gets alligned, but the focus isn't on the chest.
the focus is on the chin & the rest of the body naturally follows.

hellzyay.
keeping the chin up while sitting also is good for posture too.