i've been practicing trimming my toy poodle's facial hairs. she used to have a chaotic puffy face, but i tried to make it a poodle cut. my mom likes her face puffy, but i think this looks better. her leg is totally ok now and runs around like that accident never happened.

each morning when i wake up and open my door, chi comes running to my room and licks my hand. she's the best dog i ever had.

i prolly chill w/ chi more than anyone on the planet these days. we're like best friends.

the end.

1. i've been popping chewable papaya enzyme from vitamin shoppe like candies.
2. i bought a herbal supplement called stone free, it's supposed to cleanse my gallbladder and kidneys. i got freaked out when someone i knew got their gallbladder surgically removed. hope u get better soon.
3. i bought some sanyo eneloop batteries at costco. they can be recharged 1000 times. so, it's good for the environment and last 4x longer than normal alkaline batteries.
4. ti and justin timberlack rock.
5. last 2 days the full moon's have been really large. i wish the moon was always like that.
6. i realized that learning can occur in unlimited ways. (not just through success and failure)
7. i saw myself through the eyes of my toy poodle.

8. i think my humility is slowly coming back. i think it was important for me to test my limits w/o humility to understand and know myself better. now that i know how confident & cocky i can be, i can tame it w/ humility to make it easier for others to be around me. i think if life is started  w/ too much humility, it's possible that one can become too repressed, too inhibited and too humble that u put yourself lower than others, and this is a no-no. now i can show humility on the outside but know deep down that i can cause damage if i wanted to. before i was humble in order to avoid conflicts because i was afraid. now, i am being humble to avoid conflicts because it's a smart move.

9.  i decided not to be racist anymore. for sets of reasons i was kinda racist against blacks and hispanics. but, that hate was actually damaging myself more than those races. i'm just gonna focus on being happy. i don't really have to love these people but i don't have to hate them either. i'll just mind my own business from now on.

10. most people can't handle the truth. and, in most instances the truth isn't really necessary. bringing up the painful truth only creates negative emotional karma. whenever i bring up painful truth, it always has a way of stinging me back. the other person will lash out unconsciously or consciously eventually.  unless it's life threatening or is absolutely necessary, i'm gonna let it ride. so that means, less criticism, less judgements and less abrasive comments from me.

today was a good day.

ps11. the epilator doesn't hurt anymore. the real pain comes only the first time around, when the hairs are really long & high quantity.

so dudes, i wanted to improve the definition on my arms and legs and since i have so much freaking time on my hands and nothing really else to do.. i started researching, hair removal. electrolysis permanent hair removal, waxing, and epilator, were my 3 choices. i wasn't about to hire someone to professionally do the electrolysis for me, how embarassing would that be? and after some research i found out that most of the self@home electrolysis machines were frauds and useless, so skipped on that. i bought some wax called nads at target. i applied the wax and pulled quickly on the strips as indicated. holy fuck! i know how the 40 year old virgin felt like in that "kelly clarkson!!!" scene. omg, after trying this for about 1/3 of my leg i gave up. next day i ended up buying an epilator for $69 at target. the wet/dry type made by panasonic. i shoulnd't have wasted my time w/ the wax and went straight to the epilator. the wax pain is excruciating but the epilator pain is somewhat doable. it took me a while but successfully cleaned off all of my arm and leg hairs. lol i didn't know there was such beautiful legs hidden beneath all that hair. lol i think if i have a daughter, she will have nice legs. haha cool thing about this epilator is that i can continue to use it unlike the wax which you have to rebuy when it runs out. also, that wax method is realy sloppy and dirty. epilator is the way to go. prolly the only complaint i have about the epilator is that is colored, pink. they should make a men's color, but i doubt that many men even think about epilating their skin. oh yea, so after this experience i have this new found respect for women w/ silky skin. i know some are born hairless but some of them have to put effort into it. i now know how it feels like and can only say, re~ssspecttt!! freaking hurts. oh yea, i tried it on my facial hairs and it nearly ripped my face off. don't try it. it's good for cleaning up, stray eyebrows hairs tho.

i couldn't figure out if that email was a scam or not, so decided to pull the xanga entry. when i called, it was actually the do not call registry tho.

i've decided to prepare myself for trading. i won't be trading until next year when my hedgefund cash frees up, but i'm quite excited to earn my way independantly again. full appreciation towards all those who made it possible for me to prepare the funds and emotional support necessary for me to work independantly again. i wouldn't be able to follow my dreams of becoming a successful daytrader w/o the aid of a few key people. and, they know who they are. thanks!

how am i preparing? first off, yesterday i transformed my desk back into trade attack mode. i got my 21" samsung lcd sandwiched between my 2 sony 19" CRT's. this desk that i have is so perfect for having a trade setup. it's gonna be much easier to trade w/ this setup. feels, very spacious, uncramped like before, but centralized enough for quick scanning. this is my new setup below... (look at all those supplements under the monitors, lol)

i have a feeling i'm gonna be a better trader compared to the past. i'm gonna be able to enjoy my profits thoroughly too.

1. for one thing, i don't have any pressures in the back of my mind that will force me to make bad trades. i don't really want to mention the specifics, but i had a huge worry looming over me when i trading before. now, i will be able to trade w/ cash that is 100% mine and can afford to lose. in trading, mental state is everything. if you have worries while trading, it totally works against you.

2. this time around, i have a huge appreciation and respect for money. i went through a couple of years of living on a homeless person's budget. i know how precious a few bucks is so i will not be greedy, appreciate and be happy for every cent i make.

3. all the experience and learning i put under my belt  the past few years has made me into a mature soul (well, atleast compared to before:) my psychological disposition is much more stable than before and this will work in my favor when trading.

4. physically, i am in the best shape of my life. when i was trading before i was a fatass at 185 pounds, didn't work out and leave the house much very often. i'm surprised i even made any money in the shape i was in. healthy body, healthy mind, healthy profits.

5. supplements. dude, i got so many good supplements now that enhance my thinking power. all those smart traders who were able to take my cash in the past will have to deal w/ my new brain with enhancements from yohimbe, piracetam, phosphatidylserine, phosphatidly-choline, ginseng, eleuthero, gingko baloba, b complex. bring it on mutherfuckers!!!! (not you guys), this time, i'm taking your cash!!!

6. affirmations. i have a solid, prosperous, success-centric mindset now. this will enhance my trading abilities.

7. the ability to learn from mistakes and successes. this will be invaluable when trading.

overall, i am net positive in my trading activities. my big losses came from investments outside stock trading so, with these new added positive shifts in my life, i should be able to capitulate, bigtime.

i'm gonna start slow and easy. low bank-roll and petite objective of making just enough to pay for my monthly bills, which isn't very much since i live w/ my parents.

one other thing i am looking forward to is the way i will be able to spend my profits. before i was plagued w/ social anxiety, agoraphobia and wasn't able to leave the house and enjoy the profits at all. i can't believe how far i have come compared to before. i will be able to enjoy my profits this time.. buying nice things and going nice places and sharing the financial good vibes w/ friends and family.

oh yea, i checked many of the brokerage software that is available today. so much has changed in the span of 3 years. the trading platforms are much more sophisticated and user-friendly. i'm experimenting with them now to find the setup that is just right.

work @ santa monica, then poker night @ irvine tonight. i wonder what's for dinner, alex always prepares the best  meals for us. i need to go buy a gift before i go, maybe "just blueberries" juice @ mother's market.  that stuff is really healthy.

 if it's a muscle, it's listed here. comes complete w/ a drawing of the body part and all exercises that pertain to each. whether it's dumbell, bar, nautilus, or cable, it's there. each exercise comes with a moving gif as an example. it's an amazing site. i used to google around looking for good exercises for specific body parts, now, i just go to this site and everything is there.

http://www.exrx.net/Lists/Directory.html

always start new exercises or foreign body parts w/ the lowest weights possible. i mean, even 2.5's! if necessary.  it's more important to learn right technique and prevent injuries than look like a badass at the gym.

The Scoville scale is a measure of the "hotness", or more correctly, piquancy, of a chili pepper. These fruits of the Capsicum genus contain capsaicin, a chemical compound which stimulates chemoreceptor nerve endings in the skin, especially the mucus membranes. The number of Scoville heat units (SHU) indicates the amount of capsaicin present. Many hot sauces use their Scoville rating in advertising as a selling point. The scale is named after its creator, American chemist Wilbur Scoville.

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Scoville_heat_unit

i think students should be admitted into universities based on merit rather than on the color of their skin. even if the minority black/hispanic/american.indian student doesn't get into the university of their choice, they have plenty of other options like their local community college or a lower tier university. white and asian parental units work their asses off to guide their kids correctly and raise them into studious individuals. at times, these qualified kids will lose their spots at their desired university to middle class, upperclass black/hispanics bc of affirmative action. even if accepted into the university, it's likely that they won't be able to keep up w/ the curriculum because they were unnaturally placed into an advanced environment. this isn't always the case, i'm sure some of them thrive, but that's not the point. affirmative action creates a division based on skin color and that only encourages racism. i'm done with school so it doesn't effect me, but our kids might be effected if affirmative action still exists when they are entering college. fuck affirmative action. talent, hard work and effort should be rewarded, nothing else.

i've been functioning off of the affirmation.. "learn from my mistakes" for a year or so now. and, i also tried to learn from the mistakes of others. it helped me to identify weaknesses and unprofitable behaviors and actions so that i don't repeat them in the future. i've learned much and growth will continue from this affirmation, but, i realized today that this type of learning is too mistake-centric. i think to make the learning process complete it's important also to learn from success. so the new and improved affirmation will read, "learn from my successes and mistakes and those of others." when my attention is set on learning from success, my mind will naturally form an affinity and perceptiveness towards success. instead of keeping an hawk's eye out for only mistakes, i can now learn equally frequently from succcesses. i think my new attention towards success will effect my mood and mindset positively. i realized this new approach when i saw a hispanic guy wearing really tacky clothes. he was really trying hard to look GQ but i thought to myself that i should learn from that guy and not wear what he is wearing. but, i thought to myself, then, how do i learn how to dress? since i don't have the fashion sense to create a warddrobe that is uniquely my own, the only way i can learn is to watch good dressers and mimic their style. so, this is where i realized i should learn from the success of others, learn from what is already actually working. my fashion sense was ok a few years back, but my hermitage years have left me lacking. since i'm back in shape and my confidence is coming up, i should let my attire reflect this. cutting down on the cholo, bright white t-shirt and shorts and looking for something new.

haha

http://biz.yahoo.com/ap/070910/odd_salty_burger.html?.v=1